their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
