that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
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