Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
So vagazzling was a success
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
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