I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
Randomize
