im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
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