I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
Randomize
