We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
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