Capitaan dildo arrescate!
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
Randomize
