Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
