I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
Randomize
