If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
