how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
vagina is talking i cant
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
Randomize