I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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