There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
Randomize
