Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
GOOD IDEA: Stealing the bike a couple blocks away so I don't have to walk. BAD IDEA: riding bike for the first time in years drunk as hell. I'm bleeding and my body hurts and once again I can't find my car.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
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