you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
Randomize
