question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
So much rum. So many feels.
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
Randomize