So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
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