Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize