That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
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