I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
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