Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
Randomize
