so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
i just realized that the oil change sticker on my windshield is a day before the last time i had sex. I've driven exactly 10500 miles since.
you need to get laid.. and an oil change.
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Randomize
