Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
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