Well apparently he's into motor boating.
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
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