Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Brb crying the tears of my youth
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
