So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Randomize