You work out of a Hotel?
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
we're so committed to being not committed
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
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