Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize