It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize