In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
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