I feel like I'm in dance class right now
Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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