I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
Randomize