This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
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