Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
Can you bring me the toilet please
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
Randomize
