waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
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