anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
Randomize
