i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
