My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
you inspire me to be a worse person
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
