respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
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