Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
Randomize
