I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
Randomize
