That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
Randomize