I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
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