How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
Randomize
