3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
The adults are the big ones right?
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Randomize
