So drunk its hurt
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Randomize