maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
Randomize
