hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
