I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
He asked to "fluff my boner.."
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
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