he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
Randomize
